May 12, 2009
Before I dig into J.J. Abrams’ reimagining (shoot me if I ever use the now inescapable term “reboot”) of Gene Roddenberry’s original “Star Trek” universe, let me make one thing perfectly clear: I am not a “Star Trek” fan; I’m embarrassed by the original series’ “well, duh” profundities, boney alien foreheads, and cardboard sets. So if a lack of complete reverence is the sort of thing that’ll overheat your phaser, go do something else. Maybe you could take this opportunity to reconnect with your tribble.
***
Applying spanking new mythology to characters that millions of fans have embraced to their space-bosoms for the past several decades is, to say the least, a daunting task. Abrams - the creator of ABC’s endless labyrinth of a TV series, “Lost” - has won a big gamble. His “Star Trek” is a tightly constructed action picture that even the diehards seem to be accepting, and I enjoyed it myself, in extended fits and starts. It’s an unquestionably beautiful film, with sleek neon effects that shimmer and blur across the screen, and the script serves up a at least one jaw-dropping twist in the key characters’ relationships.
Although the actors seem too baby-faced to operate a bad set of rockets like The Enterprise, their performances are uniformly fine, if not particularly memorable. If the original series had anything going for it outside of camp appeal, it had to be the big personalities of actors like William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy, and DeForrest Kelly, so Abrams’ less quirky casting might be considered his only significant blunder.
It takes a little getting used to the idea that Kirk (Chris Pine) looks like he just finished cleaning the pool at Melrose Place, and that Uhura (Zoe Saldana) is now a slinky “Solid Gold” dancer. But you get over it quickly enough…especially in Uhura’s case, because she’s now a slinky “Solid Gold” dancer. However, I did feel a little sorry for Zachary Quinto, who plays the new Spock. Although Quinto manages valiantly, that Moe haircut and the snap-on ears could make anyone look like a kid dressing up for Halloween, regardless of the budget. I kept expecting him to whip out a bagful of mini Snickers.
From where I’m sitting, Abrams could have dropped the ball in two ways, I mean to the point that I literally wouldn’t want to watch. My biggest fear was that the screenplay would be heavy with hushed religiosity dialogue (see the trying-too-hard opening of “Superman: The Movie,” and just about every verbal exchange in the most recent “Star Wars” episodes) or that sly references to the original text would leave pockets of movie-goers in hysterics while the relatively uninitiated sit there wondering why that mention of a photon accelerator, or whatever damn thing, was so funny.
Neither of these missteps, I’m happy to say, mar the proceedings, although there was a smattering of smug applause when Nimoy suddenly showed up in the form of…well, I’ll just let you see who he plays. Nimoy’s grandfatherly presence goes a long way toward explaining the younger versions of characters who we’ve already seen turn into dumpy senior citizens. But don’t let your mind wander to your popcorn once he starts talking or you’ll never figure out what the fuck is going on.
***
Abrams opens with a rousing prologue that details the sacrifice James T. Kirk’s father, an officer on a doomed starship, made at the exact moment his wife was giving birth to their son. It seems silly to argue the sequence is contrived. The synchronization of two such monumental family events is small potatoes in a movie where a planet actually gets injected with a black hole, then collapses in on itself.
In this opening sequence, Abrams reaches just far enough toward a messianic moment to give fan-boys the shivers while cueing non-believers to the significance of what they’re seeing. Then he moves on to Kirk’s childhood and early adulthood, where, it turns out, the future Captain is a brilliant screw-up, stealing cars and getting into fistfights while trying to ignore his father’s heroic legacy. He might be the future action Messiah, but he certainly doesn’t have a halo hanging over his head, and that’s where a lot of fun in the movie comes from. His heroism enters through the back door.
Kirk’s growing up is crosscut with Spock doing the same thing way up on Vulcan, where the kids are schooled in mathematics the way the Chinese train gymnasts. Spock and his cool logic will stand in stark conflict to Kirk’s charismatic gusto for the better part of the story, again, to a much more pronounced degree than it has in the past.
You can’t help but chuckle when some bigger Vulcan kids bully Spock because he’s half human— Vulcan kids can be so mean. But the duality of Spock’s nature, the battle between his Vulcan and human ancestry, is clearly established, then deftly woven into the narrative, rather than having the character's anxieties dropped in like a single lump of bitter sugar, the way Tim Burton did it in his genuinely lousy "Batman" movies. This split persona is played out to such an extent that Spock eventually, and quite literally, has to give himself a good talking to.
***
There’s a lot of background to be established, of course, and Abrams manages it with speed and efficiency. The story proper doesn’t really start until Kirk, who’s the grounded class maverick to Spock’s student instructor at the Starfleet Academy, is smuggled onto the Enterprise by “Bones” McCoy (Karl Urban, coming as close as anyone does to channeling the performer who originated his character) for its initial voyage.
The narrative centers on a pissed-off Romulan named Nero (played by Eric Bana, often with a dark sense of humor) who’s seeking revenge for something he feels the Academy, and Spock’s family in particular, did to his home planet.
Nero lumbers around the galaxy in a ship that resembles nothing less than an omnivorous space vagina, and there’s a horrific creature Kirk encounters during an ice-covered chase later in the film that sports a dripping, screaming variation on the same theme. Freudian Trekkies should have a field day with the symbolism, if there are any Freudian Trekkies out there. It seems to me the pipe would clash with the shirt.
Abrams’ action sequences, with a couple of tight-quartered fistfight exceptions, are coherently edited on the space-time continuum, and that in itself is a bonus nowadays. He isn’t afraid to hold a shot long enough to let a bit visual information sink in before he moves on; my favorite images in the film were of the Enterprise slowly weaving and rolling its way through clumps of twisted, post-battle debris.
There’s also a stunning interlude when Kirk, Sulu (John Cho), and some other guy who has “fresh meat” stamped on his forehead literally plummet through the atmosphere before parachuting onto a massive floating platform. Abrams lets the music and sound drop away to nothing as the men whoosh along like human bullets, a moment of less-is-more that wouldn’t even occur to the vast majorities of big budget Hollywood filmmakers.
Ah, but this is a big budget Hollywood movie. The problem with something like this - regardless of the subject matter, the intelligence of the director, or the deftness of the performances - is that sooner or later things will start blowing up, and people will start hanging by their fingernails from some kind of collapsing structure. It even happens in “Finding Nemo.” Once the expected agita took over in “Star Trek,” I had had enough, but it was more a sense of reaching my personal limit, as opposed to feeling like I was being relentlessly attacked by a piece of corporate machinery. That, I suppose, is considerable progress.
So make room for more action figures. At least these aren’t as thick around the waist.
”Star Trek” is as violent as you expect it to be, with people being tortured and slammed into metal beams and all that. And that dinosaur-scorpion or whatever the hell it is that chases Kirk is genuinely scary. Little kids, or very old ladies, might soil themselves. Rated PG-13. 126 mostly fast-moving minutes.
Paul Tatara
ekenigsberg:
> There’s also a stunning interlude
> when Kirk, Sulu (John Cho), and some
> other guy who has “fresh meat”
> stamped on his forehead literally
> plummet through the atmosphere
> before parachuting onto a massive
> floating platform.
Giving credit where credit is due: the James Bond flick "Tomorrow Never Dies" does a very good HALO-jumping sequence that hits many of the same notes. The images and sounds impart the out-of-body sensation that come from such a freefall, and it provides a well-executed break from action-movie cliches. Check it out!
kez:
Nice review! I think you will be spared the wrath of trekkies... You should have produced an alternate review bashing the film just to induce the "comic book guys" of the world into an anger-fueled, six-box, twinkie eating depression (Let's see... 10 twinkies per box, six boxes, sixty cakes... yeah that would be about right.)